Let’s hear it for the dames! Without a proper warrior of any kind, and without significant sorcery, the self-described “Badass Bitches” took on and took down Druuna, the green dragon that ruled Forêt Verte. This was the longest battle against a single enemy I have ever been a party to, and it went badly for them right near the end. But they still pulled victory from the seething jaws of defeat. It was the best thing ever.
Fun fact about dragons, though. A good many of them have magic resistance, which means that even powerful spells bounce off of them like water off a duck’s back. Had it not been for this, the druid in the group would likely have killed Druuna with her lightning strikes alone. As it was the ladies did such a smashing job right off the bat through careful planning to inflict enough damage that the dragon wasn’t able to fly. She did smash around a great deal, as injured beasts of tremendous power are wont to do, but there was only one (temporary) fatality in the group. It almost had to be the bard, am I right? If you were an enraged dragon, who else would you choose to breath all over? The chick with the ukulele? Damn right. Put an end to that nonsense toot sweet. Those magic missiles did a surprisingly good job, though, and while it wasn’t as much magick as a proper spellcaster could launch, they helped do the job all the same.
The druid took a ghastly amount of damage as well thanks to snapping jaws the size of a Pontiac Bonneville. How on earth that blessed tree hugger managed to limp away from that is a testament to her skillful use of her shape-change ability and cure light wounds skill. Waving a scimitar, calling down lightning bolts left and right (which are the best distractions even if they don’t do any damage), and preventing the bard from sliding into negative hit points is an admirable feat by any measure.
Last but certainly not least, let’s give a shout-out to the rogue, who found out only last night that they get a “backstab bonus” just in time to discover that won’t work on a dragon anyway. But you could have been doing that the entire time against other enemies. I didn’t know why you had never done that, but now I get it. You had no idea that was an option. That’s hilarious and I would love to circle back to that, but last night the rogue opted to come in from the side and jump on the dragon’s back from a tree. An inherently risky move. Leaping on to a bucking enemy the size of a freight locomotive while waving a magic broadsword. This was too delightful not to allow. With some help from a wandering kobold and his wee little crossbow, the intrepid thief did her damnedest to slash the heck out of Druuna while the dragon bellowed chlorine gas and thrashed around like a hurricane full of wrecking balls. That rogue sure loves to stab things. The final blow was hers and we closed the game with Druuna lying mortally wounded and breathing her last. Anyone that thinks a high dexterity isn’t a useful thing should have been there to witness the dodging and dancing that kept everyone alive for most of the fight.
Now comes the fun part. Dividing up the experience. But none of course for the ranger. Weren’t there for the final fight? NO SOUP FOR YOU! Yes, I know you have some kind of stomach flu and couldn’t help but stay in your sick bed, but I just really wanted to yell that out. The girls will remind you every game from here on out that you weren’t there when it mattered. But that’s ok, because apparently they didn’t even need you… Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!